Yesterday, a friend of mine posted something on FB that started off with the sentence, “Did you know you can be gay and Christian?”
Two different people responded with anti-gay sentiments, because “sin” and “god” and the “Bible” and the regular bullshit one gets from bigoted people who clearly haven’t read or understood the book they are using to metaphorically beat people up with. I’m not going to go into what the rules of Leviticus were meant for in the first place or the fact Jesus never condemned homosexuality. Those things have been well established by better authors and better scholars, than me.
What I am going to say is that I am tired of people telling me how I must live my life, or that my friends or family members are wallowing “sin” by people trying to force me to live the rules THEY think are best. When I push back, when I say that no, you are wrong for trying to condemn and change people, the attitude of these people who attack is to then cry victim and foul play.
“Homosexuality is sin and you are on the same level as wife beaters, drug dealers, etc. Politically correct ideas have no bearing on Gods word.”
“That is simply not true the Bible says….”
“You don’t get to attack me for having an opinion.” When your opinion causes psychological harm AT BEST and beating or death the rest of the time, yeah, I’m going to call you out on it. Being called out isn’t an attack.
In the world we live in, this dominant group believes someone DISAGREEING with them is too harsh and too mean and they are poor little victims.
How about fuck you?
How about we talk about real victimhood. Let’s start with something small. When you say on a public forum that you think being gay is a sin, you are causing actual harm to actual people. Suicide rates among GLBTQIA+ is higher than it is for straight, cis people. Bullying of this group – especially by Christians like the one I encountered yesterday – is high not just in schools, but continues once people strike out into adulthood.
The poor, victimized Christians are so put upon and so victimized that they created conversion therapy – which is basically a method of torturing someone “straight” – so that they wouldn’t have to be “victimized” by the existence of someone their preacher says is “bad”. How do we protect ourselves from sin? I know, let’s torture children who trust us!
I have been encountering more and more of these deluded people online. They attack you for posting something gay friendly and when you defend yourself, they honestly and truly believe that you are victimizing them. DOES ANYTHING SAY PRIVILEGE MORE THAN THIS? These people who want to push their archaic, broken beliefs down our throats get upset and believe they are victimized when we say no. That isn’t kind or correct or even a good interpretation of the Bible. Pointing this out to them in even the kindest, least confrontational of ways causes them to flip out and feel victimized.
Being told that you are wrong isn’t victimization.
Being forced into conversion therapy because someone else’s god thinks you are bad is victimization.
Being beaten to death because of something you were born with is victimization. Matthew Shepard was victimized. The trans women in New Orleans that are being murdered were victimized.
Honestly, I don’t have the heart to list all of the examples, because there are so many it is horrifying and depressing and awful. Don’t believe me? Believe the FBI https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2016/06/16/us/hate-crimes-against-lgbt.html
The LGBTQIA+ community is victimized in the USA in a real, violent, constant way that people like this Christian woman couldn’t even begin to understand.
When you come onto one of my friends pages – especially when that friend is spreading a sentiment of love and acceptance – and spout the hate you were taught in your small minded church, you are not a victim when people tell you that not only are you wrong, but you are contributing to the violence against the LGBTQIA+ community.
The words “You are wrong about that” do not victimize you the way your hatred creates victims. When you cannot even let someone post about love without having to correct them about gays being “sinful” you are working actively to create an environment of hate. The gay community wouldn’t be victimized so often in their every day lives if it weren’t for people like this spreading around dehumanizing messages about them.
“I’m just saying it is a sin!”
Yeah, you are and fuck you. You could just as easily said nothing. Instead, you felt you needed to add a little more condemnation and hate. Way to love like Jesus.
Humans don’t like harming each other. The best way to convince a human to harm another is to make that person “other” and “bad” in some way. If they are bad and therefore not as human as you are, hurting them and causing them psychological or physical damage is much easier. After all, they are the ungodly ones, they are the sinners, they are “other” so causing them pain is ok. Even if you have never punched someone for being GLBTQIA+ if you contribute to their condemnation verbally, you are “othering” them and making them targets of victimization through your othering.
When we try to show you that the Bible wasn’t really condemning homosexuality, we aren’t victimizing you, we are trying to stop you from othering people who will be hurt in very real ways because of it. We are hoping if we educate you that you will stop spouting useless hate that actually gets people killed (those murdered are called victims, by the way) and start to understand that maybe there are other ways of understanding the world. I seriously recommend science, if you’re interested.
Science helps a lot.
The thing that kills me about this is that just a few days ago I got into it with someone on a pagan site because they slammed Christianity with this casual, “I don’t understand how anyone could be Christian” and as someone married to a Christian, that pissed me off big time. My husband and his church, the Disciples of Christ, are some of the kindest and most generous people you would care to meet. My very first Christmas in his church, the minister read a story of an Italian Christmas where a witch delivers presents. She did that because she knew I’d be there and wanted me to feel welcome. The majority of Christians I encounter are kind, loving people, who don’t want to harm anyone.
But then we have those who are being taught their religion is to hate and if anyone stops you hating on them, then they are robbing you of religious freedom and thereby victimizing you, people are going to dislike the entire religion. These Christians make the rest look bad.
And because I simply cannot say it enough – not being able to force others to believe the way you believe isn’t victimization, it’s freedom of all religions. I know most of our legislators right now don’t understand this concept with Christianity being the dominant religion of the land but that doesn’t make it untrue. It just makes them wrong and being told you are wrong doesn’t make you a victim.